I wish I could say it’s when my children cry for their father or when Izzy asks if her father wanted to die. I wish I could say it’s my own cry or the other night when Izzy took my head to her chest, rubbed my back and told me it was going to be ok over and over because I was crying so hard (a first and hopefully a last because she caught me at such a bad moment when I thought they were asleep)…I wish I could say it’s the silence. I wish I could say it’s talking to John and not getting an answer back.
No but those are sad too.
The saddest sound is when you call companies to remove your husband’s name from a bill or an account. They say their sorries and then you hear the click of the mouse on the computer erasing his name. He is eliminated. Just like that. In one second. He is gone.