“I miss the four of us” Izzy said.
“Me too” I said.
“Me three” Said KitKat.
We waited for “Me potato!” or “Me banana!” from John. After a few seconds, we all realized it wasn’t going to be said. What once made us explode with laughter made us grieve the same time in the same way (which is very rare, by the way). We immediately came together and held each other in silence. It’s been more than a year of us having that conversation. To not have it complete is terrible.
I asked them if they wanted to look at family pictures and they said yes. We scrolled through them and remembered some good times.
When they were asleep, I scrolled through the pictures and realized that we don’t have many pictures of us all together. It was always me behind the camera, capturing the magic of their childhood or sisterly bond. I wish we had more of all of us together. It’s a hard pill to swallow. Especially when I look at pictures and I know exactly where John was when I was taking the pictures and how easy it would have been to take selfies with all of us in it. Damn it.