“I want a dad”

“I want a dad” KitKat said to me today.
“You want Dada?”
“No, I want another dad. I want a dad to do things with.”
This was hard to hear,  take in and deal with. She knows John is dead and isn’t coming back and her logic is, why want her own father? She wished for him back for so long and she realizes her wish will never come true…so she wants another. This will change. KitKat will want him from time to time. She will think about him and miss him and want to do things with him. I know he will never be replaced and he will always be her father.
It’s her grief-her way and her way of dealing with it. It’s different from where I am or where Izzy is. It’s hard to juggle…it’s just so hard.
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